"Alleged Victim", Witness, it's a bunch of hooey

As some of you may already know, I was a victim of domestic violence just after Thanksgiving.  My boyfriend, who I believe to be bipolar, was drinking a lot (I was drinking as well), and he got mad at me and beat the crap out of me, even knocking out two teeth.  He is not aware of most that happened that night, and I think that's wrong.  I want us to heal, and for him to receive treatment for things he has never had the privilege of addressing before this incident, in spite of numerous close calls.  I refuse to let something like this happen to me without there being a positive outcome.


What bothers me the most is that I have absolutely no say in anything related to this case.  I have no representation, and the defense and the prosecution can freely volley my name or classification (alleged victim or witness if they don't use my name) an no one is there to represent my interests.  They can say whatever they want about me, and I'm not there to tell my side, or defend myself in any manner whatsoever.  I am merely a pawn for the prosecution or defense.  Something is horribly fucking wrong with that scenario.  


Why does our justice system allow for no protection for a victim?  Why don't I have an attorney who is there to ensure that nothing unseemly is said about me, and to protect my interests?  To keep me from being the proverbial tennis ball lobbed from side to side...she was drinking, so her statement doesn't hold as much weight. Well, if he was drinking, then his statement doesn't hold weight either.  So where does that leave everyone?  Oh!  I know!  It leaves the defendant covered and the witness (VICTIM) standing naked in the wind.  Uncovered, unprotected.  Is that really justice?